Week 12 Reading Diary, continued: Alice in Wonderland

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll (1865).

A Mad Tea-Party

• The hatter, the march hare and a couple others were sitting at a dinner table under a tree in front of the house
• They were all crowded on one end with no room
• Alice sat on the other end in a large armed chair
• The hare said it was rude for her to sit without an invite
• She said she didn't know it was his table
• The hatter said her hair needed to be cut
• They talked
• The hatter stared at his watch uneasily
• He asked Alice a riddle
• She didn't know the answer
• The hatter and the hare said they didn't either
• Alice said they shouldn't waste time telling riddles they had no answer to
• The hatter said it's not wasted if you know him, Time that is
• They talked about how you could manipulate time if you were on good terms with him
• Now time was stuck at six o'clock
• The hatter was to sing and after he got a verse out the queen said he was murdering time, off with his head
• Since then time wouldn't do anything the hatter asked of him
• They woke up the dormouse to tell a story
• They offered Alice more tea, but she said she hadn't had any yet
• The story went on until Alice became so confused that she said she didn't understand
• She said, "I don't think....." and the hatter said, "Then you shouldn't talk."
• She left the tea party angry
• She found a door and opened it
• It led back to the hallway with the table
• She went to the door behind the curtain again and ate some of the mushroom she saved in her pocket
• She shrunk and went into the garden

The Queen's Croquet-Ground

• There was a white rose tree in the entrance
• There were three cards painting the roses red and arguing
• They eventually saw Alice
• Alice asked them why they were painting the roses red
• They explained they planted a white rose tree instead of a red rose tree and the Queen would behead them if she knew
• Then one shouted the Queen was coming
• A procession of guards, children, kings, queen, and the King and Queen of Hearts came upon them
• The Queen asked Alice who she was and who the three cards were laying face down
• Alice said she didn't know, it wasn't her business
• The Queen screamed Off With Her Head!
• Alice said Nonsense!
• The Queen saw the rose tree and told the guards to behead the three cards
• Alice hid them in a nearby flower pot
• The Queen asked Alice if she could play croquet
• Alice said she could and joined the procession
• They got to the croquet ground and Alice learned it was not your typical croquet
• The balls were live hedgehogs, the mallets live flamingoes, and the guards doubled themselves up to make the arches
• Everyone played at the same time in a frenzy
• The Queen kept shouting for the beheading of players so Alice began to worry
• She was looking for a way to escape and noticed the cheshire cat's smile floating in the air
• Alice talked to the cat for a bit
• She was about to say why she didn't like the Queen but the Queen was close behind so Alice played it off
• Then the King came to see who Alice was talking to
• He didn't like the cat and told the Queen to have it removed
• She yelled Off With His Head and the King went to get the executioner
• Alice went looking for her flamingo and hedgehog
• When she returned the King, Queen and executioner were in a quarrel and the crowd was silent
• They eventually went to get the duchess, since it was her cat, and the cat started to disappear
• The King and executioner looked for the cat while everyone went back to the game

Who Stole the Tarts?

• There was a trial for the knave
• He was accused of stealing tarts the queen made
• The jury was made up of animals and birds
• The white rabbit called in the first witness, the hatter who was accompanied with the march hare and the dormouse
• The king demanded his evidence and if he was nervous he would have him executed at once
• Alice began to grow bigger
• The queen was still staring at the hatter
• She then demanded a list of the singers from the last concert
• The king eventually dismissed the hatter and he was out of sight before the queen said to behead him as he left
• The next witness called was the duchess' cook
• During his questioning the dormouse spoke and the queen called for his beheading
• During all the commotion the cook disappeared
• The next witness was called, Alice...

Alice's Evidence

• Alice had gotten so big that when she got up she knocked over the jury box with her dress
• She then picked up all of the jurors and put them back in their place
• After a couple of questions the king told her she was over a mile high and had to leave
• The white rabbit then said he had more evidence
• He had just received a letter, but it wasn't signed and it wasn't in the knave's handwriting
• The king and white rabbit went back and forth of how the knave could or couldn't have written it
• The knave swore he didn't write it
• The white rabbit read the letter
• The king then explained how it was the knave that authored it
• Alice disagreed and the queen finally demanded her head
• The cards began to attack
• The next thing Alice knew she was waking up to her sister wiping the leaves from her face that had fallen from the tree
• She immediately told her sister the curious dream she had
• Her sister agreed and sent her in for her tea
• Alice hurried home and thought of how wonderful her dream was

(illustration by Sir John Tenniel)